Feech (feech) wrote,

Just some stuff about Firefly

FYI, Jeff, this is just prior to the skiff accident, I guess. Anyone wondering what the brackets stand for, it's my attempt to simplify (laziness and confusion) a situation where Jayne has handwritten, often faultily, a modified future-Chinese character and I don't want to attempt to get pronunciation and write it out wronger. Anyway. Jayne sat in the galley with a piece of tan-colored notepaper and a weepy black-inked pen.

"deer, Ma [who raised me]

"How is brother [brother] Barber, you have heard from him? Fighting fires. I take it. He is sure a hero. I have had no letter in a long time and I--"

"Hey Mal!" he shouted without looking to see whether the captain was close by. "How do you spell 'would?'"

"Would as in wood, or would as in wood?"



"Thanke... Don't look right."

"Don't forget the 'L'."

"Oh. Okay."

"woold like to heer from him yet hes busy."

River leaned suddenly over Jayne's shoulder. "Please remember to thank Mrs. Cobb on my behalf."

"Oh yeh." Jayne noted:

"Miz Tam sez thanks and preciation"--

"'Appreciation'," corrected River.

"Gal, that's a lot to strike out and write over!" Jayne completed the word anyway, in as efficient a manner as possible by squeezing the missing letters in at the front.

"--for the fine [present, gift] it is what shes been needin."

"Thank you for asking her to make it for me, it is a magnificent object of wool craftsmanship and I treasure its fluffy tassel."

Jayne grinned.

River darkened, yet continued in the brightest of manners, "I would appreciate the gesture more if it weren't a transparent attempt on your part to divert my attention from the ongoing goal in that brain of killing me while I sleep."

"Miz Tam is such a kidding tipe. We [party, fun times]. I surely treasure her on this ship."

"I spose the big news heer here is Miz Zoe is going landside awhile and it is my fondest suspicion she will leave her place so I am clear next in line and as well I am ambitious for her post as she has had it a long time and I am verr good at my job.

"Also I could kick her ass if she weren't looking and her senses were dulled."

His seat at the table certainly had the best light, yet the most interruptions. Still, when Mal spoke, low, Jayne jumped.

"I got as many settings on my cattle prod as you got ambitious plots, Cobb," the captain warned lackadaisically.

"Jaysus, you reading my mind too now?"

"It's a short read. 'Sides, you're reading out loud to yourself as you're pennin'."

"Oh. I am? Oh."

River settled cross-legged on the table, remarking that this would be a place for a brighter individual to have inserted a euphemistic comeback. Simon, flipping through the recipe/inventory pages for anything that would satisfy a dessert craving without cocoa, to which he had developed a psychological-turned-physical intolerance after enough time on Serenity-style cookery, shot River a disappointed look. "River!"

"What do you mean?" Jayne glowered. "I'm plenty bright. 'Sides, Captain's just teasin'."

"Am not. You might do well to remember that while you're watching for an opening, I'm watching Zoe's back."

River giggled. Simon pretended not to hear her, and instead inquired of Jayne, "What are you writing? The great solar systemic novel?"

"Letter to mother."

Simon almost smirked. "She must be some woman, to have raised the model creature you've turned out to be."

A mocking note on Dr. Tam's part was hard to lose on Jayne. "Ma's a saint and anyone who thinks differnt can bite a hunk outen my big hairy ass!"

Simon blinked, closed his dessert investigations. "Thanks I-- just ate. For the last time."

Jayne growled. "Anyway I'm the best boy. She raised up my brother Barber and he got tossed out of prison the third time he went. Took over the whole gorram penal colony. They got him out but couldn't roust him or his company out the rocks outside the walls. Don't have the money to shoot down the drug shipments and most of 'ems too crooked and backward to want to anyhow, and besides he pays 'em. Ma thinks he's fightin' fires on a flying-ship yard. She thinks he makes all that money on hero reewards. I'm better'n he is an' all I require is a little step up on what power others got on this boat.

"Ma says I'm a gorram angel."

Simon ran a comment through his mind and let it go.

Mal glanced sidelong at River, who looked mischevious, then grinned and resumed his mild reminder warnings to Cobb. "Take me seriously or you're bound to regret it. The cattle prod I refer to has many customized settings. There's for good Jayne, who only needs to be sparked to get previously mentioned ass out of bed."

"I get up prompt and good when I'm s'posed to! Why does everyone get on my case?"

"And the higher setting is called 'Baaaaaaad Jayne' and is for cases of insurrection against ladies of superior offices."

River collapsed. She seemed to be amused, but was muffled by her own curled-into-a-ball glee.

Jayne furrowed his brow and frowned. "Your-- your cattle prod does not say those things! I ain't falling for it."

Mal, pleased, turned to the paper he was reading under the island lights. As he skimmed the ads, he casually informed Jayne, "The company that made my cattle prod knows how much you weigh."

Simon winced. "This is getting into a whole weird area. I'd better absent myself to parts less lewd."

River sat up, flapping tassel and hair back out of her eyes, and frowned at Simon's back. "You're not fun."

"We won't miss ya," Jayne said after him out of habit, faithfully continuing to scratch away at his letter.

"Here is a cred # where you can get some money. It is under an assumed name due to the undercover--"

In mid-sentence he suddenly turned a worried expression on the captain. "Your cattle prod has medium and high settin's same as mine!"

Mal read his paper placidly. River stretched out on the tabletop so she could look up at Jayne's face from under her hat. "If you were braver, you could have made this an entertaining battle of dirty insinuation jokes."

Jayne backed his chair up slightly. "Who said anythin about jokes. I'm not doin' anything wrong, the girls are still untouched, I haven't done anything but threaten Zoe's and River's life and that's nothing new."

"True," Mal reassured him. "We're right glad you're pennin' a letter to mother and it's good you have enough education to keep in touch."

"Right." Mollified, Jayne looked over his letter and wrapped up.

"--nature of the work by which I made it.

"How is weather is the rain terraforming out right for youall.

"deer God bless & Keep you safe.

"all my love


"That's sweet," said River.

And now... to see if I can possibly convey the above using the annechen_melo vignette method:

Jayne thoroughly stamped his letter home with Serenity's bar code and Ma's home town's postal address. He had prepared to disembark when Mal snagged him. "Jayne." The captain paused to be sure he had full attention, then explained. "Seeing as Zoe has her godfather and a few family blood men on this world, it's her intention to visit a bit as well as seein' to interviewing the duck pilot. We will be leavin' her here a spell and I need a right hand in her place on a deal or two, guess it'll be you-- it'll have to."

Jayne began an expression that involved curling an upper lip, but it was unfinished. River flounced close by in gown and a thick wool tasseled cap, and turned back to twirl for the captain. She then waited until he realized some response was in order. "It looks right fashionable," Mal offered.

He then continued to Jayne: "I'm used to havin' a right hand with some smarts and I 'spect you to be behavin', understand? We shiny?"

Jayne glanced at River, who was crossing her eyes at the wayward tassel and mentioning its raw wool weights to knitted goods ratio. Then he turned to Mal with a grin showing a full spread of teeth. "Shiny."

And for jeffreycwells's edification:

After Jayne had been in the infirmary in a coma for a couple of monts or so (and it may be a favor, though it is so difficult for Monty-- after all, Zoe didn't need the hassle, and Haven would have thought twice and even refused if she'd known all about Jayne before setting out) Simon apparently shot him in a case of mistaken identity. You can imagine the conversation I had with Simon re:zombies. "Zombies? Must be a generic fill-in thought and it's some other thing." "No, _zombies!_" Frantic. "Zombies as in corpses raised into living--" "Yes!" He later has some theories as to how this happened but I guess he has to have-- he's the doctor on a spaceship. ;) I have no ideas. They were cryo'd guys who somehow were corpsified as per that drug or just the freezing itself, and were also necrotic, their seals had broken, yet they came up and after blood. None actually came on the ship. But Simon entered the darkened infirmary (not sure why it was dark-- there again, he knows it's supposed to have lights, and had some excellent reason why it didn't, only there again he hasn't explained it to me) and saw a hulking shadowed thing where Jayne ought to be in bed and well, in the dark, managed to hit him. As soon as he did it, the familiar roar alerted him and then he really panicked that he'd have to defend himself against Jayne and shoot him again. So he abruptly put him out with drugs. River's comment: "You killed him again."

The spiffy thing about the above is that the one sealed truly cryo'd fellow was and is their captain we had talked about. River spontaneously called him "Danny", and I know not much after that yet, except that she said, "Now I can go home!" and nobody knew what she meant and they felt sorry for her. But of course she meant now Monty was free. Except that some time has to pass-- that can confuse her though she likes the boy's company quite well as it goes-- he's really a boy in age when they pick him up. There was no question of leaving him after some of what's transpired in the past.

As to what happens in the Jayne situation, no idea. I'm on a desperately need to know basis and Simon is mum. And teasing.

Also, that is now thought to be Wash imaged as a child in sleepers praying in some kind of high building, as opposed to Jayne, though Jayne was in my head at the time-- he so easily-- Jayne that is-- crosses over with other people that it confuses at times. I consistently think Jayne's home is on a low, spread-out ranch, so it just doesn't follow.
Tags: fan fiction, firefly

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